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All In

My heart is hammering in my chest. Breath synchronized to the rhythm of my pace. Baseball hat pulled down low. Game face on. I run. Slacker radio channeling Truth in lyrics and rhyme into my mind. Tonight’s top selection: Newsboys and TobyMac. I want to quit.

I run. I want to stop. I run. If I walked the rest of the way home, no one would know. I run.

“I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”- Phillipians 3:14

“Do you now know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets a prize?

Run in such a way as to get the prize.”-1 Corinthians 9:24

Praying it would rain, I run. I see my goal in sight, a water bottle resting on top of my mailbox. I run faster, sprinting towards my goal, legs feeling like Jell-o. I drink from the water bottle, but its not enough. These tiny sips of water one straw full-at-a-time are not enough. I need more.

I run to the dock, kicking of my shoes, ripping off my earphones and hat. I dive All In. The water envelopes me and I feel refreshed. I swim alone in my thoughts and the meaning of being–All In.

Every fiber of clothing, every ounce of my being is saturated with water…. Saturated by God’s love, grace, mercy, and forgiveness. There was a time in my life where getting a little bit of God here and there was enough. As if sipping water only when truly thirsty is enough. My thirst for a relationship with my Creator is more than straw full of sips of water. I want to be All In. I climb out of the water and notice puddles forming with each step. I see the water drip off my elbows, fingertips and eyelashes. I laugh at myself. Noticing how the water continues to puddle where I walk I pray.

“Wherever I go Lord, may I leave evidence of your grace like puddles forming where I step.

Evidence of a girl..All in love with you.”


P.S. Swimming alone is dangerous and I don’t recommend it. P.S.S. Living a life without Christ is even more dangerous. “May you and I be mutually encouraged by each other’s faith.” -Romans 1:12

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